Fun with language

In my recent desperation to overcome a serious case of writer's block, I did a google search on "tips for writing". Somewhere amidst the flurry of clicks, I ran across this silly page about How to Write Good. While it didn't automatically cure my writer's block, it did give me a needed break from the somber post I was writing. Just "follow these tips, and you'll be writing gooder in no time!"

A few of my favorite are:

• Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
• Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
• Parenthentical words however must be enclosed in commas.
• It behooves you to avoid archaic expressions.
• Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
• Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake
• Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixed metaphors - even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
• Hopefully, you will use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.

Finally, in honor of my high school writing teacher, Mrs. Trow, who made us write excruciating papers without a single "to be" verb....

• The passive voice should not be used.

I love these things! Does that make me a total nerd? Oh well!

Tags:

• grammar
• humor